Oh.

Just realized that pretty much all the people images I see in patterns are white people.

This started out as one of them and then I made that realization lol HARSH YELLOW WIN? HARSHELLOW. MARSHMALLOW.

A hand, a foot, and a head

Not too bad for procrastinating until the night before. Couldn't figure out how to paint my foot. Eek. Hair is really flat now that I look at it. Uh. And didn't really know how to create an environment... thought about one of Jason Sho Green's blogs and his learning about using doors or something for environments??

Also, colors aren't exactly accurate [Camera and bad lighting]. I used orange/white and purple lol

Things that I am afraid of

A list that reminds me I am human, even though I don't really need more reminders. 

• Losing my parents to death or to alzheimers 
• Spiders
• Losing the use of my hands
• Losing my vision
• Vaginas
• Penises
• The intersection of vaginas and penises and/or other things
• Being stuck in loneliness
• Being homeless
• Losing my memory
• Not dying in a terrible accident
• The destruction of my stuffed animal, who I creatively named Bunny [it is a bunny. lol.]
• Evil supernatural things
• The dark
• The stretchmarks on my butt and hips

Childhood Struggles Storybook Project: Imagery Collage Example

Click to enlarge, as always. These are mostly examples, but they were kind of therapeutic. I'm not really into collaging, but I didn't want to do super artsy stuff that might intimidate people [and I'm not trying to be cocky, but I have found that it doesn't take very much to creatively intimidate people].

This is the image representing my struggle. More of an exploration on the idolization of white people for really... no good reason. This idolization has taken up most of my past 21 years, covering my pride for being Chinese-Canadian. Even when I was really into Anime and Japanese culture... there's still a whole lot of idolization of white people in Japanese culture, as well... as noted with the unnaturally large eyes, and lot of the blond-haired characters, among other nuances.

Oh, it cut off a little at the bottom [it says FIGHT on the bottom right]. This represents what empowers me. A whole lot more simple. What empowers me? Being. Being with friends. Dinosaurs. Robots that can love [because I always portray myself as apathetic, but I am an uber closet romantic]. Taco Bell [which humorously relates to my serious coming to terms and appreciating being Chinese]. Cute animals. Food. Bacon. Foooooddddd. More fooodddd. More cute animals. Animals with inappropriate names. Cartoons. Silly tattoos. Science magazines. Comic books. The APAHE conference! Oh. I totally didn't put the MCC on there. D8 The MCC IS the exploration lol

In other news, I made some okay curry today, but I undercooked the rice. WAH WAHHHHHHH

Sketchbook Update

Lots, but still lacking in quantity and whatever quality means

Randomly bought Ata/Toast's art collection book for like $15 at a half off bookstore in Berzerkley. TOTALLY AWESOME FIND. His work is really intricate and novel [he was one of the forerunners of the more 3D style typography graffiti movement]. And his real people sketches are fluid and human. Love ittttt. Not a big fan of his vector work, but I'll admit that it is INSANELY INTRICATE. I'm just not big on vectors in general.

Was inspired to do weird abstract things. The above reminds me of... some painter... but I am really bad at remembering names of painters. I am totally going to fail art history whenever I decide to take it.

I was experimenting, but this 3D type graffiti stuff is really difficult! I was gonna write Hellxia, but then my professor was talking about Edgar Heap of Birds [who gave an eye-opening lecture about his art, and he had two great shows in town], so I started writing Heap at first... lol

More experimentation inspired by Toast.

Quick studies of my own hand. My new schtick is to make still lifes AS FAST AS POSSIBLE because I hate still lifes, but I desperately need the practice... but I also need to start SEEING the still lifes that I'm drawing. What's the point of making a photo-realistic copy if I don't even learn anything from it because I'm so focused on abstract details? 

Copying Toast's hand studies. Iono how he makes it so natural.

Was reading some of Chad Sweeney's Parables of Hide and Seek. I won't analyze poems unless guided by an instructor, but I really like the imagery I get from his words.

I wish I could draw the things I visualize. One day.

Oh hey, look, it's that racist kid from elementary school! Thanks for the 16-ish years of hate!

I didn't intend for her to look like she's jerkin her gerkin, which doesn't make sense anyway. Her hands were in her pockets. That's how us lonely people dance. We do it for ourselves. 

One of the images inspired by learning about Asians in the Dream Act at the APAHE conference. I hope to one day make a painting out of it. I think I was thinking about wanting these undocumented students to gather together to rally against injustices against them... but then if they did, then it'd just be easier for the government to incarcerate them and send them back to cultures in which they no longer feel belonging. ALLIES MUST FIGHT! Somehow.

He was gross anyway, good riddance, boy-I-never-got-to-know!

Composition sketches for a Life Painting hw assignment. Supposed to paint 1. a hand, a foot, and a face 2. two hands and a foot or 3. two feet and a hand. And have some kind of environment. I guess.

haha I'm a pervert lol 

I'm compulsive when it comes to the skin on my fingertips.

Trina and I! Walking to the art lab. We are friends and mentors and students of life!

I'm not really sure why I started drawing this, but it started as legs, and then a face, and uh, well I guess that's all there really is. I guess I could say that it's about the exoticism of "Asian" women in American society, and the exoticism of "White" people by a bunch of Asian cultures. It's weird and stupid. 

Weird and stupid like this HYPERVENTILATING UNICORN and koffing. My band members rejected Lin's idea for a band name. I am sad. So very sad.

Sad like these eyes that are crying. Made this and the below image for a fellow intern's Queer People of Color: Liberation Through Journaling program.

I'm so hipster, I know, right?